The Courage of Marshall

I’m supposed to be in bed right now. But there is nothing like a sports movie to rev me up and keep me awake! It doesn’t help that I have cried, then laughed, cried again, jumped up and down screaming and laughed some more. (Let’s just say I like to participate). If you know me at all, you know I LOVE true stories (can you tell?!).

We Are Marshall is the story of healing after the loss of Marshall University’s entire football team after a devastating plane crash in 1970. Over and over, one theme stood out to me: the process of healing can be painful in of itself and it takes great courage to face the pain in hope of finding peace and the strength to move forward.

The picture the movie paints of the tragic loss of 75 team and family members of a West Virginia community is heart wrenching (I sobbed for the first 15 minutes). Although they were actors, they represented real parents, real friends, real brothers and wives who lost everything just one mile from the safety of home. The magnitude of such loss can only be described as a spirit-numbing devastation in which an entire community painfully mourned. Football is the LAST thing anyone wants to hear about. Makes sense considering it only reminded them of what they lost.

But Nate Ruffin, one of four team members not on the plane, is driven to rally a football team back together. And it is his leadership efforts that rally an entire community to support the rebuilding efforts of Marshall University football.  At first, I was awed by Nate’s insight and courage to play football again. Then I realized that, for Nate and many others in his community, he was still trying avoid the heart of the matter and get away from dealing with the grief. Unlike the others, his method was to DO something and dive into trying to recreate what he thought he’d lost. It wasn’t until 3/4 through the movie (probably the equivalent of a year and a half later), that Nate broke down and allowed himself to face the painful question, “Why? Why did this happen?”

His coach gave him an honest answer, “I don’t know.” And Nate finally had to face the pain and started weeping. Shortly thereafter, he found relief and sighs with peace.

What caught me by surprise was the revelation that it took MORE COURAGE for the man to allow himself to ask the question why and face the doubt, the fear, the pain and the grief head on when there was no possible answer in sight. Deep down, he had to know he wasn’t going to find an answer he was satisfied with. But in order to heal a gashing hole in your heart, you must first look at the wound. And yes. That is a painful process. And yes…it takes courage to look at it.

I don’t know about you but I have been there. More often than I’d like to admit, I ask God why. Several times I have been in deep pain, grief, and a depth of loneliness that threatens to choke the air out of me: It’s all I can do to cry out, “WHY?!” I know I won’t get an answer in that moment. We may never know. And I wonder, would the “why” really help anyway?? If you had the answer, would it really help you move forward?

We have two choices: be unsatisfied until we find out why and risk withering away into ourselves with grief OR be satisfied that we may never know why and move forward in hope of finding peace and joy once again.

So if we muster up the courage to choose option B and move forward, how do we rise from the ashes? How do we begin again from such a broken place? It is with great insight that Coach Jack say, “It doesn’t matter whether we win or loose. What matters is that we play the game.”

He wasn’t just talking about football; he was talking about life. He was talking about getting up after we have been beaten down. He was talking about standing after we fall, about trust and healing. He had insight I’m not even sure he was fully aware of: insight only God understands and we so often miss:

It’s not about waiting for the pain to pass and THEN moving forward: moving forward in spite of the pain IS the healing process! It’s the JOURNEY, not the destination that matters most. And it’s in the process of walking that journey you rediscover the joy and adventure of living LIFE!

Do you have the courage to dare look up from the ashes of your pain? Do you have the courage to rise and walk to find healing? Whatever you grieving and painful situation, I pray you do. I pray God and His community of believers sends you a helping hand to encourage you to get back in the game.